Talk about the battle of who cares less. A mediocre Ohio State team is going to play a horrible Michigan team. Do you remember a few years back when this was the battle of the number one and two teams in the country?
If you are even remotely interested in this game you fall under one of these categories:
#1) You had the displeasure of being recruited by one of these colleges. You have to play.
#2) You are one of those die hard Michigan fans who brag that they are the “winningest football of programs of all time”. You are ignoring the fact that you had a 60 year head start on 95% of the teams playing today. You have little in life that brings you joy. You should look into finding multiple hobbies.
#3) You are on the coaching staff. See #1’s reason.
#4) You are a Ohio State fan. Let’s face it, you have very little going in this mortal coil outside rooting for this below average football team. You also know that Michigan BLOWS HUGE HEARTY CHUNKS under Rich “Big Balls Rod” Rodriguez. You smell blood in the water and could care less that in 3 years time your team as well could become the national embarrassment that Michigan is right now.
#5) You are related in some way to one of the kids playing in this game. You have to watch.
#6) You work for a media company that is forcing you to cover this game. That sucks for you but at least you are getting paid for your attendance to this Pop Warner level football game.
#7) You are a bookie in Vegas and you had the task of trying to figure out a line that would make you the most money.
#8) You are a member of the Dead Schembechlers. A spectacular band that takes punked up R.E.M.-ish sounding songs and writes Michigan hate songs. Oddly enough, if you fall under this reason why you are watching this game, you are having the best time during this debacle of a game.
#9) You are a proud member of these once “beloved” schools. You call one of these two hell holes your alma mater. You get to spend the afternoon talking about the old days.
#10) You are Sarah Santarelli, Cheerleader for Ohio State. I looked online and saw both squads. Sarah is hands down the hottest cheerleader of the two squads. She’s a senior and her major is nursing. Sarah… Email me… lenny (at) wnde.com. Let’s go to Steak n’ Shake for dinner!
If this game goes like we all think it should, Michigan doesn’t stand a chance. Ohio State wins this game.
If I’m wrong, I’ll check in later. If not, I’ll have more stuff up tomorrow.
